[Cavegirl and the kids of the village splashing around in pool]

Dad: Cavegirl!

[After kids are out of pool]

Cavegirl: What a drama queen

Dad: Guard duty is the most important job in the tribe. While you were splashing about having fun, a rival tribe could have attacked the village. What would that mean?...we'd all be dead now. So I've passed a new law...From now on...swimming for teenagers...is banned...Permanently

[Babble from grouped kids]

Cavegirl: And what if we say no? What if we refuse to accept your new law?

Dad: I'm warning you Cavegirl, don't start

Cavegirl: Dad, either you let us swim or we're leaving

Dad: Leaving? You're not leaving...You're exiled! All exiled...until you publicly...beg...for...forgiveness

Trunk: Chief?

Cavegirl: Which is like going to be...never



[The teenagers head off]

Cavegirl: I don't care, I'm glad we're exiled

Big Sis: Me too, it's going to be great, no adults, no chores

Roast: No more stupid rules

Nettle: It's going to be one big holiday



[Teenagers sat by pool]

Cavegirl: What's wrong?

Stiks: I can't get used to not being told what to do

Cavegirl: That's fantastic. We get to do what we want, when we want

Stiks: Do you not think someone should be in charge?

Cavegirl: A leader?...Maybe I could be...

Big Sis: Shall we eat? I'm starving

Cavegirl: OK, let's go hunting



[Cavegirl, Stiks and Nettle go hunting and return]

Cavegirl: Yup, that was one mean-looking rabbit...We're back

Big Sis: Excellent. What did you get?

Stiks: Well, we almost we nearly did...but we didn't quite

Cavegirl: Nothing

Trunk: What?

Big Sis: You are so useless

Stiks: Sorry

Trunk: Sorry? Sorry doesn't cut the mustard

Roast: Yeah, we can't eat sorry

Stiks: I'm going to bed. Where's the hut?

Big Sis: The huts? Er it's er er

Trunk: Yeah it wa umm

Big Sis: Not built yet

Cavegirl: And you've got the nerve to moan at us

Stiks: At least we tried

Nettle: Oh, this is just great isn't it. There's no shelter

Big Sis: And no food



[Back in the village]

Dad: Lovely day...fancy a walk?...Please, not the silent treatment, I can't stand it...I had to exile them, what could I do?

Mum: Stop feeling so sorry for yourself. It's not you suffering out there in the wild. I mean, what kind of man are you? Exiling your own daughters

Dad: Could we go back to the silent treatment please?



[Exiles]

Cavegirl: (to herself) I seem to be the only one doing anything around here

Cavegirl: OK guys, breakfast...I know what we said but we should choose a leader...someone who's going to give out jobs every day and make sure they get done...otherwise I'm going to be doing everything

Nettle: Some people just can't be trusted

Big Sis: And others are just useless

Trunk: I thought you said we weren't going to have a leader

Cavegirl: I know, but look at the mess we're in

Big Sis: We need someone who's smart, decisive, with strong leadership qualities. Oh, which narrows it down to...yours truly

Cavegirl: I choose me

Stiks: I'm for Cavegirl

Cavegirl: Whose it to be?

Nettle: OK I choose...

Big Sis: Pick me and I'll give you a day off

[Sounds of approval]

Cavegirl: That's bribery

Big Sis: Exactly...told you I had leadership qualities

Cavegirl: But...

Big Sis: No buts...right...Trunk and Roast, you start building the huts. Nettle you do the laundry. Cavegirl, Stiks...

Cavegirl and Stiks: Hunting

Trunk: But I thought you said we was gonna have a day off?

Big Sis: Next week...Oh and guys, make me proud



[Cavegirl and Stiks go hunting. Sat on rock eating]

Cavegirl: Mmmm. That was outstanding

Stiks: Aaah, absolutely

[The others arrive]

Big Sis: Enjoy the meal?

Cavegirl: We had to eat it

Big Sis: Why?

Cavegirl: Give us more energy for hunting...we've got lots of energy now haven't we Stiks?

Stiks: Yeah er yeah um bags of energy...raring to go?

Cavegirl: So now we're much more likely to catch something...big like a hog...something that will really feed us all

Trunk: Oh, so what you're saying is you actually ate it to help us

Cavegirl: In fact, the more I think about it, the more I realize we've done you a big favour

Big Sis: Cavegirl...How dumb do you think we are?...You're not getting away with that...just for starters...you two aren't sleeping in the hut tonight...Right guys?

Trunk: Er er

Roast: Yeah, right

Trunk: Well no, actually no one's sleeping in the hut tonight

Big Sis: What aren't you telling me?

Roast: We had a few chats you know...didn't we Trunk?

Big Sis: How far have you got?

Trunk: Well we couldn't work out what shape to make the roof you see so...

Big Sis: Whatever keeps the weather out blockheads

Trunk: Told you we'd get in trouble

Stiks: Shut up...pointy, they were best???? pointy

Trunk: Pointy...

Big Sis: You haven't even started yet have you?

[They walk off]



[Village]

Dad: Morning

[Nobody answers, Gran with group of children]

Gran: ...then the evil chief sent the innocent children into the deep dark forest, where they were probably eaten by a land serpent

Dad: Gran!

Gran: What?

Dad: Maybe you should tell the one about the good chief who risked his life to save the tribe from the land serpent

Gran: Or how about the one where the evil chief exiles the children, and then stops everyone talking about it (kids approve)

Gran: Once upon a time, there was an evil chief...



[Exiles]

Cavegirl: Had enough of this, it isn't working

Big Sis: Yes it is. We're having a great time aren't we? Trunk, Roast, Nettle?

Cavegirl: I think it would be much better for all of us if I was leader

Big Sis: Get lost

Cavegirl: The only way to turn this around is to get our act together

Nettle: She's right

Big Sis: Shut up Nettle

Cavegirl: We'll starve if we don't have something soon

Big Sis: Then get on with it

Nettle: Wait a second Big Sis, maybe we should talk about this

Stiks: Yeah, you just can't decide to be a leader

Big Sis: I can and I have, finito. Anyone who doesn't like it, exiled

Cavegirl: Exiled? I'm not exiled, I'm leaving. Anyone else coming

[Cavegirl, Stiks and Nettle leave, Big Sis gives Roast and Trunk the evil eye]



[Village]

Dad: Where's me tea? I'm starving

Gran: You can get your own tea. The women are on strike

Dad: Strike?

Gran: Because you exiled the kids. So now thanks to you, the men will have to cook their own meals, clean their own caves...

Dad: The men are supporting me. They said it was the right decision

Gran: That's not what I heard. The men are talking about having you...replaced

Dad: Replaced? Never

Gran: Don't say I didn't warn you



[The teens are building]

Cavegirl: That's it...finished

Stiks: Pretty cool

Cavegirl: Excellent...right, I'm off to get some water

Big Sis: Come on guys, get the roof up...not like that, they go on top

[Cavegirl walks past]

Big Sis: Where're you going?

Cavegirl: To get water

Big Sis: Across our land? I don't think so

Cavegirl: What! I've got to go this way to get to the stream

Big Sis: Not my problem

Cavegirl: Look, you can't say this is your land

Big Sis: This is our hut, so this must be...our land

Cavegirl: Is that so?

[The hut caves in]

Big Sis: You idiots

Cavegirl: So now you haven't got a hut, this...isn't your land. Problem solved

[Big Sis runs over to the other hut and kicks it to pieces. Nettle and Stiks scream]



[All the teens together]

Stiks: I've had it. I'm going home

Roast: Yeah he's right I'm going too

Trunk: Yeah me as well

Nettle: And me

[They start back to the village]

Cavegirl: We'll be the laughing stock of the village. They'll just think we're kids who couldn't get it together. I think we should stick it out

[Sound of breaking branches]

Trunk: What was that?

[Grunting gets louder, kids scream and run behind tree]

Big Sis: (to Cavegirl) I'm sorry. I've been really awful...I just wish you weren't always right

Cavegirl: OK listen...We've got to kill that...that...thing. We're hungry, we need to eat

Nettle: I prefer the going home option

Cavegirl: Think about it. If we kill it, we can go home as heroes

Stiks: Or, Option B, we don't go home, because we're dead

Big Sis: Cavegirl's got a point. There's six of us, and only one of that thing

Stiks: Right. So you all want do die. Is that what you're saying? Is that it?

Cavegirl: Trust me, it'll be fine

[They head for the thing in the bush]

Stiks: I...do not believe you...talked us into this

Cavegirl: Shhh

[Grunt now sounds like snoring. Cavegirl charges alone at the bush and jumps in. Sound of struggle. Cavegirl comes out on Dad's back, spear held across his throat]

Cavegirl: Dad!

[All sat down]

Cavegirl: ...So why exactly are you here Dad?

Dad: I'm here...because...being a good and kind chief, I'm giving you a second chance

Cavegirl: And why would you do that Dad?

Dad: Well you've had your punishment...now it's time to ask for forgiveness and come on home

Cavegirl: Can't do that Dad...Got our own place...and we love it...don't we?

Big Sis: Yeah. We're happy happy happy

Dad: Oh

Cavegirl: Nope. There's no way we're coming back...unless of course you offer us a deal

Dad: What sort of deal?



[Dad sat with Gran on rocks]

Dad: ...And would you believe...they actually thanked me for teaching them a lesson. I always knew it was for their own good. I love these kids. In my heart, I wanted them back here...But I was only doing...what I had to do

Gran: And did they...beg for forgiveness?

Dad: Oh yeah loads

Gran: Back on guard duty?

[Dad smiles and nods]



[Kids back in pool]

Cavegirl: Great. Did a deal with Dad...no more guard duty...swim as much as we like...we got exactly what we want